Day 1: Kuala Lumpur
First off, I'm in Malaysia and it's a real place. Everything else I have to say is secondary to that fact. Sarah and I are well and we've already met up with a fellow ETA, the illustrious Ellie Cross. On the down side, we have yet to be contacted by anyone in a position of authority, so there's still a remote possibility that we've been flown halfway around the world and put us up in a nice hotel for an elaborate practical joke. Time will tell.
Food worth talking about:
For the SFO to Taipei trip, I ordered the "Asian Vegetarian" meal and convinced Sarah to get the Kosher meal. since they required 24 hours notice I figured they were more special and tastier. I was a little wrong.
Sarah was given: a cup of frozen vegetables, a cube of ice sealed in a plastic 3 ounce container (which actually turned out fine when it was combined with the inexplicably hot cup of water she was also served), a slice of gefilte fish with two olives, and for the main course, the traditional kosher small buzz-saw pasta and grey slabs of rabbi-blessed question marks. There was also a small tub of 52% whipped spread (the other 48% was solid?) which came with a caveat: "There is a dispute among Poskim concerning the proper Bruche for this roll. Please consult with your own rav." How? When? Are the Jews supposed to find one in Asia, carrying around their contentious roll and 52% whipped spread until then? Or are they supposed to wait until their return flight to the states when their dilemma will no doubt double once they are served yet another problematic meal?
Asian Vegetarian proved to be a much better choice, consisting of: shiny rice and flavor sponges that tasted like mushrooms, fresh fruit, pickled carrots and 3.5 ounces of strawberry Jello. 3.5 ounces might not sound like a lot, but keep in mind that was a whole half an ounce more than the amount of water allotted by God for the orthodox Jews. Unlike the chosen people, Asian Vegetarians do not, it seems, require water to survive, although they do need Jello, and in slightly larger quantities.
Furthermore, the Taipei airport has a bathroom with a picture of a normal toilet on one stall and the picture of an overturned surfboard on another stall. This, I now know, is a squat toilet. I tell you, it's a strange, wondrous world out there, and I get the sense that weird toilets are only the beginning.
It's 8pm, which means I have an hour left to go to the pool, "This is where gentle breezes cool swimmers and guests seeking pure pleasure." (Sic) Needless to say I'm going for the sole purpose of finding the verb at the end of that sentences. Do the guests seeking pure pleasure find it? Do they get free drinks? Or maybe the guests seeking pure pleasure realize that as long as they are seeking, their pleasure will always be a little hollow, for their desires can never be fully quenched, even by gentle breezes. I leave you now to answer this question, as I go to seek pure pleasure and.
-Ezra
Food worth talking about:
For the SFO to Taipei trip, I ordered the "Asian Vegetarian" meal and convinced Sarah to get the Kosher meal. since they required 24 hours notice I figured they were more special and tastier. I was a little wrong.
Sarah was given: a cup of frozen vegetables, a cube of ice sealed in a plastic 3 ounce container (which actually turned out fine when it was combined with the inexplicably hot cup of water she was also served), a slice of gefilte fish with two olives, and for the main course, the traditional kosher small buzz-saw pasta and grey slabs of rabbi-blessed question marks. There was also a small tub of 52% whipped spread (the other 48% was solid?) which came with a caveat: "There is a dispute among Poskim concerning the proper Bruche for this roll. Please consult with your own rav." How? When? Are the Jews supposed to find one in Asia, carrying around their contentious roll and 52% whipped spread until then? Or are they supposed to wait until their return flight to the states when their dilemma will no doubt double once they are served yet another problematic meal?
Asian Vegetarian proved to be a much better choice, consisting of: shiny rice and flavor sponges that tasted like mushrooms, fresh fruit, pickled carrots and 3.5 ounces of strawberry Jello. 3.5 ounces might not sound like a lot, but keep in mind that was a whole half an ounce more than the amount of water allotted by God for the orthodox Jews. Unlike the chosen people, Asian Vegetarians do not, it seems, require water to survive, although they do need Jello, and in slightly larger quantities.
Furthermore, the Taipei airport has a bathroom with a picture of a normal toilet on one stall and the picture of an overturned surfboard on another stall. This, I now know, is a squat toilet. I tell you, it's a strange, wondrous world out there, and I get the sense that weird toilets are only the beginning.
It's 8pm, which means I have an hour left to go to the pool, "This is where gentle breezes cool swimmers and guests seeking pure pleasure." (Sic) Needless to say I'm going for the sole purpose of finding the verb at the end of that sentences. Do the guests seeking pure pleasure find it? Do they get free drinks? Or maybe the guests seeking pure pleasure realize that as long as they are seeking, their pleasure will always be a little hollow, for their desires can never be fully quenched, even by gentle breezes. I leave you now to answer this question, as I go to seek pure pleasure and.
-Ezra
Comments
Onward!
Annie
Oh, Sarah said the driver was there all the time. Yeah.
Your airplane meal sounded great! And I think Sarah was supposed to check with the rav in the back of the plane...
since I'm a fan of your sense of humor I will be checking your blog-
and yes, squat toilets may be just the beginning given what I experienced in Nepal.
Have fun! Be flexible and take care of yourselves!
Watch the water and eat carefully until you know what's what. Boy do I sound like an adult, or what?!
love and happy new year!
Carole (and Michael - he'd want me to say hello if he knew I was writing to you!)